Hope

Philippians 1:6
"being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus."


What I want to write about today is something I've heard preached about in my church not that long ago.  Sometimes you don't feel saved.  Sometimes I don't feel saved.  There's still a lot of issues I have to work out and get better at with myself as a Christian.  Some days it feels like I'll never get better or that really I'm no better than I was before I got saved.

For a long time I dealt with doubts about whether I was saved or not.  Honestly, I know now I wasn't.  I tried to be for years and tried to convince myself and others that I was.  Just over a month ago my daughter passed away.  I had really been having doubts and confusion about my salvation before it happened.  After she left us to be with God I had had enough of the confusion and doubting.  I had to know for sure.  I had to know that one day I was going to see her again in Heaven.  My heart was broken and I had to do something.

That Sunday morning before her funeral in my men's Sunday school class I expressed my doubt and my desire to know right then if I was saved and was going to be reunited with my little girl again one day.  I broke down.  My pastor and the other men there prayed with me and walked me through the plan of salvation.  I begged Jesus to come into my heart and save me and give me assurance that I was saved.  I gave my whole being to Him.  And a peace came over me and I knew I wasn't lost anymore and I knew I would see her again.  This is not to say that I only wanted to be saved so that I could see her again.  Her passing brought me to the place I needed to be to surrender it all to Him and truly accept Him as my Savior.

But, since then there's been a lot of days I've felt like I'm no better than I was.  I've felt like I'm still just as filthy as I was.  I've learned though through my pastor's teaching that you're not always going to feel saved.  It's not about feeling anything.  When you're saved you're saved and the devil will take every opportunity to throw up your past and cause you to doubt.  It happens to everyone, which is a very comforting thought.  Being still new to this, I have a long way to go.  There's a lot of room for growth.

So, I think when you feel like you're no different that you were before you accepted Christ it's good read verses just like this one in Philippians.  It reminds you that yes you are still a sinner and you will fall, but God isn't done with you.  What He started that day or night or whenever it was you got saved, He will finish.  He's continually working on you, if you let Him.  That's what sanctification is.  You work through your problems and sins and you get better by His grace.  You become set apart from the world and farther from where you were when you started.  You won't always feel saved or like a good Christian, but God will finish the good work He started in you when He saved you.  Day by day through prayer and study of His word you will get better.  He has a good and perfect plan for you and He is always faithful.